Soup Roundup

Ask any former waiter what food they can’t stand the sight of. We ALL have one item that turns our stomach because we served it a million times a day. In college, I worked at a café that was famous for its French Onion Soup. We had to scoop the soup into a crock, put a hard-toasted crouton on top, and hand it to the cooks. The cooks would throw a handful of parmesan on it, drape it with a giant slice of Gruyere, and then run it through the salamander (which is like a long broiler with a moving rack.) It was too hot to pick up, but if we didn’t grab it fast enough the Night Manager would yell at us to move our asses and get the soup out 911, or he’d hire a dog to serve food because dogs have more brains. Night Managers are the fucking worst. I don’t think I’ve eaten onion soup since then, because – ugh. That said – this Vegetarian French Onion Soup recipe sounds tasty, and I bet my family would love it. Plus, you know. Melted cheese is the food of the gods.
True story: the only soup my mother ever made for us was Campbell’s Chicken Noodle, and to this day when I am sick that is all I want. Not homemade, not fresh vegetables, not real chicken. Just Campbell’s from a can, a handful of saltine crackers crushed on top. When I’m sick, I’m a very cheap date. But I won’t have anything to do with that when I’m healthy, so I want to make some better recipes. If you are in the mood to up your soup game, I have a few suggestions here.
I don’t use parsnips enough, but I am going to rectify that by making this Roasted Garlic and Parsnip Soup With Sage and Lemon Butter. Because I think it looks purdy.
Dying for this Roasted Tomato Bread soup. Roasting makes even the anemic winter tomatoes taste good, but next summer I think I will try to freeze several trays of my garden tomatoes to have a really good winter soup.
This Sweet Potato Soup sounds deee-lish, and bonus: it’s vegan. If you care about that kind of thing. I don’t but I prolly should.
Another vegan option: this Curried Pumpkin Soup uses cashew cream for richness. Sounds daunting; is actually very easy.
I hate lentils in theory – they look like dusty little pebbles. But whenever I eat them, I vow to try them more often. This Broccoli Raab and Greens Curried Lentil Soup seems like a good place to start. I’ve made a lot of Tim’s recipes, and they are always great.
Cauliflower soup sounds like what they serve in a Dickens orphanage, but this Roasted Cauliflower and Chickpea Soup is beautiful.
Irish Beer Cheese Soup, with Smoked Paprika Popcorn? Um, ok. That’s not soup, that’s a Superbowl party in a bowl, but whatever. I’m down.
And obviously, what is soup without carbs? Nothing. So check out these recipes:
Cheesy Corn Cake Topper would be great on chili.
Garlic Parmesan Skillet Rolls. I mean. Who even needs the soup?
Spinach, Artichoke, and Bacon Stuffed Soft Pretzels sounds like a meal all on their own. I think you should make these when the soup isn’t very promising. Soup is kind of dumb food, let’s be honest. These crazy pretzels would fix that.
Savory Apple, Oat, and Herb Scones sound divine. Another one that would be good for breakfast.
Don’t get mad at me for posting a recipe in French; that’s why God gave you Google Translate. Just look at the pictures of this Pain Feuilleté au Roquefort and tell me you don’t want to stop eating store bought bread forever.
Ignore the 90’s TGIF appetizer menu name and just go with the goodness that is this Bacon Jalapeno Popper Cheesy Bread.
Easy Overnight Dark Rye Finally I found a bread recipe that doesn’t contain bacon or cheese. This one actually looks wholesome. I bet it would be fantastic for breakfast, lightly toasted, with a smear of unsalted butter and a dab of good jam.
Re-reading this post, it occurs to me that I only really like soup for the accompanying bread. Do you have a soup recipe for me?
PS – Be careful:

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